The Goo Goo Muck

I'm not the greatest mathematician. If you've ever watched me try to calculate a tip or figure out how much longer a movie lasts, yo...

The opening day of Mowing Season is always bittersweet. Sweet, because after my lawn looks nice, I am free to judge my neighbors' shabby...

A few weeks ago I'm at a training session at work. I'm waiting in line to sign the roster to get the all-important training credit (...

Years ago one of my ex-wife's friends told us a story about how her and her brother would cause all sorts of trouble for their parents g...

If you've followed this foolishness for any length of time you'll recall my belief in the healing power of booze. I wouldn't con...

I did a google search for googoomuck the other day. Oh, like you've never googled yourself. The first result after a few awesome Youtube...

Because of the rain, I've had to drive to work the past two Saturdays. This always sort of throws me off my game, as my daily bike ride ...

The boss was talking to someone close to my little cubicle. Boss: "Scotty's around,* right?" Me: "Yeah, why, were you guy...

"Y'all have comedies? You know, funny talkin'?"

Some night back in the late '90s I was walking with my friend Pat back to his apartment after buying a bunch of beer at Gator Beverage t...

First off, that red thing a block ago? That was a stop sign. You were supposed to apply the brakes. Secondly, in America, when making a turn...

Poor people sure love their tattoos. Every third person that comes up to the reference desk looks like a Maori tribesman, if the New Zealand...

One attorney/city worker looking guy in his 40s to another "What's wrong with you? It's like you don't even care who won Am...

Since I realize nothing is more fascinating than other people's dreams, here's one that I had the other morning. I was teaching this...

If you were ever a fan of any sort of non-mainstream music, no matter what it was - techno, punk, black metal, swing, goth, Peruvian folk mu...