Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Fantasy Man

I was trying to finish up some work on the desk last week when this fairly haggard looking dude came up. He was missing a couple teeth and smelled like those terrible poor people cigarettes. He was looking for two fantasy authors who between them wrote about 30 different series. Not that big a deal, and the guy was nice enough but after the third “So Crystal Elves comes after Magical Time Wand or does Castle of Mystery come between them” question, I was ready to beam the guy with my 20-sided die. I was helping him the third time when my boss came to the desk to relieve me. The book he was looking for could have been in two different places in the building, so my boss called upstairs while I checked the SF/Fantasy section. When I got back he was gone, on his way upstairs. My boss was laughing.
“What’s so funny?”
“That guy you were helping said you were very helpful.”
“Well, that’s always nice for the boss to hear.”
“He also said you were very cute.”
Nice to know I still got it.


bryan said...

poor people cigarettes? You truly are the Fitzgerald of our times! C. Scott Adams!

scott said...

I swear that's an actual brand, Poor People Cigarettes. The only thing I know about them other than that fact is that they smell like a wet dog who rolled around in an ashtray.

bryan said...

oh C. Scott! A true literary genius! I can smell 'em now.

Keith said...

I often make reference in conversation to "Hobo's Delight" gin. But I think I stole that from Bender, seeing as by heroes in life include Bender and Quagmire.

That said -- have you ever had Cromwell Gin? I like that it's cheap gin named after a Puritan, but I also like that it costs like $5.99 for a gallon jug. I always assume a spirit is good if 1) it is sold by the jug, and 2) the jug is plastic.